According to my "Monopoly Game Piece Theory," the Monopoly piece you prefer is very telling of your personality. What is your favorite Monopoly piece?
|Battleship: You are very confrontational, and a little mean. However, you are also gifted in the arts. This combination is why many of your paintings or poetry or musical compositions or whatever sometimes come out sounding angry and mean-spirited. Basically, when you're not such an asshole, you're a good person.|
|Cannon: You like the cannon? Really? Why? Anyway, you are very outgoing, and always ready to raise your hand in class. You are also extremely interested in Civil War reenactments. In fact, you are obsessed with them to the point where you can't even play a board game without wanting to be reminded of them. Actually, you're kind of creeping me out.|
|Dog: Because my personal game piece of choice is the little dog, it would be biased of me to discuss what choosing the dog says about your personality. With that said, people who chose the dog are fantastic, fantastic individuals.|
|Horse & Rider: Music is very important to you (if not, just pretend it is). Also, you are very nature-orientated and concerned about the environment. You're also very political, even though you never seem to really know what you're talking about.|
|Iron: Your area of interested is sports, and you love to compete. Or you at least like to watch sports and competitions. Or at least you think about them sometimes, like when you're trying to get to sleep on a hot night in June. Yeah, you like them.|
|Race Car: You are a friendly and popular person who is generally good at reading peoples emotions. However, you are often afraid to voice your opinions. This is probably because a lot of your opinions are kind of stupid.|
|Shoe: Liking the shoe means that you are naturally generous and giving toward your fellowman. Additionally, you are an excellent writer. It's a shame you smell a little bit nasty.|
|Thimble: You are a grandmother. There’s no other explanation. Also, you’re not that good at Monopoly.|
|Top Hat: Your sense of humor is appreciated by your friends, and you have a way of being the life of the party. However, you need to focus more on your long-term future. I mean, what the hell are you going to do with your life? Are you just going to sit on the couch all afternoon? Jesus Christ, go get a job. And vacuum the goddamned living room like I asked.|
|Wheelbarrow: Your individuality is important to you--that's why you pick a piece that nobody else would even consider using on account of how stupid it is. In contrast, you are fairly smart; it's too bad you always act like kind of an idiot.|
I didn't doctor this image at all--it is exactly how I stole it from The Monopoly Website. Notice how the Monopoly Guy is inexplicably wearing dainty little girlie shoes as he escapes from prison. I don't understand!
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